


Not Worthy

by Redacted1



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Critical Condition, Heavy Angst, Hospitalization, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Metaverse (Persona 5), Multi, Reader Has A Palace (Persona 5), Reader-Insert, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:08:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24665131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redacted1/pseuds/Redacted1
Summary: I'm just not worthy of it.Worthy of what?Their time and feelings.(A new Metaverse has reappeared and the Thieves get together again)(My first Fic, Criticism is welcomed)(Temporary Hiatus)
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Reader, Kitagawa Yusuke/Reader, Kurusu Akira/Reader, Morgana (Persona 5)/Reader, Niijima Makoto/Reader, Okumura Haru/Reader, Sakamoto Ryuji/Reader, Sakura Futaba/Reader, Takamaki Ann/Reader
Comments: 12
Kudos: 75





	1. Flashback

**Author's Note:**

> This is a flashback to after Yaldabaoth, but before the reapperence of the metaverse.

You woke up like you normally did and changed into your school clothes and prepared to go down stair, when you heard the unthinkable. 

Your parents arguing.

You just stood in the staircase and listen to their angry voices screaming at eachother. They were arguing in the livingroom so you chose not to disturb them, you made your way to the fridge and pick out a carton of milk and you favorite cereal. Everything was going great until you stumbled and fell on the floor, getting the attention of your parents who instantly stop arguing and walked to the kitchen to see you clumsly laying on the floor. It was embarrassing to say the least but your mother help you get up and ready, meanwhile your looked like he was ready to burst. 'Oh no' you think when your eyes connect with his. 

"Honey calm down" your mother said to your defense.

"How am I supposed to calm down when she listened in on our conversation" He said.

"I wasn't listening in!" You practically scream at him. You learned later today that you were gonna regret that decision.

You got out of your mothers comforting crasp and pick up the bowl you drop on the floor and left it in the sink, you then put on your shoes and walked to the bus stop, sat down and heard your phone buzz, you pick it up to see a messege in the Phantom Thieve group chat.

@Blondie (Ryuji): Hey I know that summer vacation is coming up so how bout we go and pick up (Y/N) and spend it togheter.

@Blondie2 (Ann): That's a great idea Ryuji, I have almost no photoshoots this time so I get to spend more time with all of you.

@Frizzy (Akira): I'm down to do it.

@BlueBoy (Yusuke): I have to meet with an old friend some days in on vacation but other wise I'm down for it.

@H@Ck3r (Futaba) Is that alright with you (Y/N)?

You wanted to say yes so much but you know you ahve to ask your parents first about it.

@You: I don't know yet, I'm gonna ask my parents about it later today so we'll see.

@H@ck3r: That's fair.

@Biker (Makoto): But until we see eachother again we have too study to stay like normal students.

@Blondie: You're no fun, but ok. I gotta go see ya.

@You: See ya Ryuji. I'm also gonna go now, my bus is gonna get here any seocnd now.

And before you could see any messages pop up you walked on to the bus and went to school.

School went by slower then usually so when you finally heard the finally bell ring you went home immediately to discuss it with my parents (Your Mother), but when you got home only your dads car was parked in the driveway so you expected the worst. And low and behold as soon you closed the door behind you, you felt a sharp felling come for your cheek. It took a couple of seconds before you realized that you 'father' had slapped you. You hated that word, he didn't deserve to anywhere other then the deepest parts of hell, were he will be frozen* til the end of times. You rub your hand over the sensitive skin of your cheek and let out a soft 'ow' before your head turns to your other side and you walk backwards, til your back is against the door frame.

"That's what you get for listening in on our conversation this morning" Your father says with a sharper tone then your used to.

"But I didn't listen on what you conversed about!" You say

"Then it is for spilling milk and cereal on the floor and leaving before cleaning up your mess" He comes up with on the spot. You don't say anything and just take of your shoes and place them in their spot. You then turn on your heel and walk up stairs to your room were you almost immediately throw yourself on the bed and cry til your mother comes home.

"All i do is cause problems and arguments" you quietly say that becomes almost unhearable as you said it with your pillow to your face.


	2. Summervacation meetup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Y/N)-chan arrives in Tokyo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't a total failure?!, WHAT i wasn't expecting that.

Now here you were on the express train to Tokyo after two days of careful planning and promising your parents to keep up your studies during your trip, your were happy that they let you got to Tokyo in the first place but now you were going to be in a place were you actually felt like you belonged and you cherished being with your friends, because now matter how hard you screwed up they wouldn't yell at you or hurt you. You decided that you had earned a couple minutes of sleep on the way to Tokyo.

Meanwhile in Tokyo the group had all decided to meet you as soon as you left the train, they knew where you were thanks to an app Futaba planted on your phone during your thieving days. They all met in Shibuya a couple of hours earlier to discuss what they wanted to do today, after hours of discussing what to do Futaba notified them that you were 20 minutes away from the train station so they went and payed for the food and snacks they had eaten during there wait. While walking to the train station Akira remembered something you said awhile back. 'When I come back to Tokyo someday I want you to not ask me about my familly, I get rather emotional when talking about them.' 

"Hey Guys" Akira said to get there attention while still walking to the station.

"What is it Akira sweetie?" Haru said in here usual tone

"I just remembered something (Y/N) said to me before she went home, she said to not ask her about her familly live when she gets back to Tokyo." Akira said with a tone that could be interpreted as worried.

"I remember something she said as well, something about how she wouldn't like it if we called her father 'Father'. I don't exactly remember the reason why." Goro said, all most bumping into someone because he wasn't focusing.

"Oh look, the detective can't remember." Morgana said in a teasing tone

"Ok, but i think we should ask her when the time is right." Goro said, and everyone but Akira agreed. He was wondering if something happend when you were home that they didn't know about.

"Akira is something the matter?" Yusuke asked in a worrisome tone.

"No I'm just thinking, let get going before she gets here." Akira to reasure Yusuke.

To say that you were suprised when they all ran up and hugged you was an understatment, you nearly broke down in tears when you saw them. They had all met up a couple of hours earlier to discuss what to do today, and you were all for the plan they had. The were gonna start with leaving your luggage at the hotel in your room and then go and have food at some new resturant in the city. After they were done with food the girls suggested you went with them on a shopping spree, you agreed much to the boys suprise, Ann just said that they can have you tomorrow. And after your shopping spree so were they gonna drop you of at the hotel where you was staying at. To say that were overjoyed was an understatment, they had planned all of that just for your arrival to Tokyo.

You knew that you were gonna sleep good tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have set up a schedule when i'm planning to update this series.
> 
> I'm think that I'm gonna try uploading on Mondays, Thursdays and Sundays.
> 
> This will give me time to think of what to write, but will also give me some free time.
> 
> Anyways see you thursday. 👋


	3. Hanging with the boys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You knew that Persona user can't have shadows, so why do you!

Today was the day, you were going out with your friends who had planned for this all of yesterday. You decide to let the guys know that you were going to sleep in a little, because you're tired from all the times you and your parents argued late in the night.

**You:** I'm going to sleep a little longer is that OK with you guys?

**Blondie:** Yeah that's fine for me at least.

**Artistic:** May I ask why?

You knew that at least one of then would ask you this.

**You:** I guess I'm just tired from the train ride here.

You felt bad for lying to them about this but your were going to tell them at a later date.

**Prince Charming:** I can understand that.

**You:** I will see you all soon!

And with that you set an alarm for one hour and went back to sleep. 

(Timeskip to one hour later)

You wake up to your alarm and decide to wear a light blue off the shoulder top with a large X in the center of the top, a pair of light grey short with front pockets just big enough to fit your phone and wallet. You also put on a pair of black thigh highs socks and for shoes you put on a pair of nikes. You decide one last long in the mirror can't hurt and as you make your way to bathroom you text the boys to notify them off you geting ready to leave and also asking where you should meet them. They say that they while meet you in Shibuya central near the hospital. 

You had almost forgotten how big Shibuya central is and as you make your way over to Shibuya Genral Hospital, you see something strange in the crowd, and alarmingly it looks just like you, except with at beat up face and is wearing what looks like something a prisoner would wear and meeting your gaze at it you saw the thing you hoped it wouldn't have, Golden yellow eyes. Shocked as you were you were still in the present and seeing your friend near the entrance of the hospital made you worry less. As you ran over to them and started following them to were they had planned to go, you couldn't stop thinking about the thing that looked like you. 'That should not be there, i had a Persona, i conquered my shadow right?' You thought. The others didn't seem to notice it in the crowd so why did you?

"Is everything alright dear?" Goro said pulling you out of your thoughts.

"Everything is fine Goro, besides I'm hanging out with you four so everything is beyond fine." You says with a smile that goes from ear to ear.

"Hey! Don't forget about me!" Morgana screams from the inside of Akira's bag. All of you chuckle at Morganas antics and you can almost feel the pout he's wearing.

Everything was going to be fine. (Except it wasn't)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for late upload, i had some familly issues and had to solve them with my parents.
> 
> But here we are at the end of this chapter. See you Sunday.


	4. The unexpected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unexpected trip to the metaverse but you don't know that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Nicknames the characters have are just in chatrooms she is in. So i the case that they create a chatroom without (Y/N) it's just their names.

As it turn out the "new" resturant in town was just the renovated diner in Shibuya. It had a very new aesthic and the menu was very different for the last time you were there. You order the nostalic steak and a coffee, Akira orders something small because he's not hungry at the moment, Ryuji and Yusuke order a soda while Akechi just a coffee. As your food and drinks arrive you get the feeling the you are being stared at, and you know it's not Yusuke because he and Akira are talking about something related to art, while Akechi and Ryuji are also talking about something and that thing being food. After you had eaten your nostalic steak you excuse your self to the bathroom. when you arrive you still feel the sensation that someone is staring at you, but when you turn around and look around you don't see anyone particularly interested in you.

'Hmm, Weird' You think

And as you turn around to continue going to the bathroom you see the unthinkable. A corridor that seemingly goes to infinity, you hear a voice calling to you as you walk down this corridor and you recognize this voice almost immediately, it belongs to your dead brother who died when you first came to Tokyo from an uncurable disease that have plaged you family long enough. The "Rock" disease as it's called. And the last time you got to hear his voice was the day before what happened that sent you to Tokyo. You had a similar backstory to Akira, were you tried protecting someone but ended up in Juvenile hall around the same time as Akira. 

Before you know it your running towards the voice and as you expected it comes from one of the cells that are in the walls. You run up to the particular cell and grab the bars that seperates you and him.

"Yu!" You scream

"(Y/N)!" He screams

"What are you doing here?" You ask him as he walks up to the bars and take your hand.

"I don't know all I know is that I died and then apperently i ended up here in this cell." He said while looking at you

"Don't worry I will get you out of here so you can rest in peace." You say with a smile full of pain

"Yeah that would be helpful." He says with a little chuckle you haven't heard in a while.

And with that conversation and that your brother has to be saved so he can rest you wave good bye and continue walking down the corridor. You see the end. YOU SEE THE END. You rush towards the end, but get stop by two guards.

"Hey! Let me through!" You say.

"We can do that unless you have a visiting permit" One of the guards says.

"Dude, do you see who it is?" The other guard says with a almost hateful look in it's eyes.

As the first guard turns to face you his eyes widen in shock and says. 

"Right this ways miss. Follow us." He says

You have no idea where they are going but you don't argue because you can't really fight at the moment. And soon you arrive in the room at the end of another corridor, but this one looks shockingly similar to LeBlanc.

And then you see IT. The thing you hoped not to see on this unexpected trip to the metaverse.

**Your Shadow**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -The Rock Disease comes from Part 8 JoJolion Of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure.


	5. The New Velvet Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dialogue heavy chapter. Will explore what the phenomenon you walk in on last chapter

You remember something special that happend at the end of last year. Something about a long nosed man and a lady who had a large book. Something about the God of Control and how he had imprisoned Akira and by extension Morgana. 

"Welcome to MY velvet room." Your identical copie says

"Why do I have a seperate Velvet room for Akira?" You say

"Oh don't be alarmed, you don't." Your copie says

"Huh?" 

"You see, this room is between mind and matter, dream and reality. Many people share the same velvet room, only that they can't get in." She says

"Then why am I here right now instead of when I'm next asleep?" You say in a worried tone

"Because you have fainted in real life." She answers

"Huh!? Why!" You say with a raised voice

"I don't know but what I do know is that you will come here one more time on your own tuition." She says and also adds a chuckle

"So i will still go here when I sleep, but something will happen to me that will make me come here?" You say

"That is correct."

"Then where is Igor and Lavenza?" You say

"I said this is MY Velvet room after all, so the master of this place is me. My Lavenza how ever is your brother." She says

"Then why is he imprisoned?" You say

"Because he disobeyed my orders." Your 'warden' says

"We'll it seems it's time for you to go, we will surely meet again." She says before clapping here hands

With her clap the ground shacks and you find your self falling, falling into what feels like a tall well with no bottom, until you feel yourself slow down til a standstill. You try to open your eyes, but it requires a massive amount of energy that you don't have at the moment. You feel yourself slowly drifting into a sleep. And surprisingly you don't end up in the velvet room. You dream of how you and your friends are hanging out and visiting hot spot and just having a great time togheter, however, theres this looming threat over your group that you can't explain. It has an aura that far surpasses that of cognitive Wakaba in Futabas palace. But at the same time it has a welcoming aura aswell. Both like how you would explain your father and mother. Your father has an aura that is unwelcoming and that's not pure evil but it's close to it. Your mother however has a welcoming aura that is pure sunshing and rainbow, it makes you wonder how your parents got togheter.

If only the metaverse was still a thing, then you could change your fathers heart so that he would be understanding of how you and your mother feels. If only...

...but it exists and you just don't know it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not uploading yesterday. I was wrting this chapter but before I knew it, it was to late to write more. So I'm writing it today.
> 
> I'm also plannig to change my upload schedule next week and forward to Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. that way i don't have to write to chapter back to back, Sunday and Monday.


	6. Update

Sorry for not updating in what seems like forever. But I have just been lazy and procrastinating for awhile so, I'm placing this under a temporary hiatus. Sorry


End file.
